Decisions, Decisons (Emily Prescott)

[lilyevans]

Everything was different now. She hoped things would be calm, as she walked out of the Gryffindor common room and down those long flights of stairs, until she made it to the entrance of the castle. Taking a deep breathe, she paused momentarily before opening the giant doors and stepping out into the fresh warm day. It was a Friday, and classes were over for the day. It was only a few hours until nightfall and that was when everyone would have to return to the castle. Until then, she was going to enjoy each and every second without interruption.

Because of the recent events the fifth year was more cautious than she probably would've been. With the Death Eaters making their move on Hogwarts, it meant they all had to be on high alert and not take anything for granted. She walked out of the castle, and headed straight for the lake. Severus and her other friends had been busy, and she had hoped to find someone to hang out with, even for a few hours time. She hadn't seen Emily in a while so that made her all the more nervous. She had her wand at her side, not because she was paranoid, although recent events made her more than ready to defend herself should the need arise.

As a muggleborn, Professor Dumbledore had told her to watch out for herself, especially after classes, because she would be considered a prime target for those who were doing the devil's work, as the muggles would have called it, though in wizardry, what he meant by that was the Death Eaters as they certainly could not be trusted.

She was so deep in thought that once she had gotten over to the lake, she nearly tripped over someone's feet. She hadn't been paying attention to her surroundings the way she should have. She was standing by a tree close to the blake lake. She didn't say anything as she waited for the other to speak. As she had no idea, who she had nearly fallen on.

[Emily Prescott]

Emily needed the break from all the non stop gossip and talking that was still following her around the school. You would think after a week of being back and out of the hospital, people would have found a new topic to fuss over but no, she Lachie and Marlene were still the number one topic on everyone's lips and she was sick and tired of being at the recieving end of all of their looks and whispers now. So with a huff, and gripping her wand tightly in her fingers, Emily had moved outside, wanting the time to clear her head and get some fresh air.

Chase still hadn't been in touch over the date so as far as Emily was concerned it wasn't happening. Sure it hurt, stung even but she wasn't going to hold it against him, well she'd try not to. So here she was heading towards the Black Lake all the while staying sharp in regards to her surroundings, every single one of her senses on high alert. After relaxing here for a bit, Emily decided she would return to the common room, change into something a lot more comfortable and read her new book, Hogwarts: A History.

Smiling slightly, the blonde fifth year, dropped down against one of the trees over looking the black lake, still gripping her wand firmly in her hand, ready for anything. Slowly a calm began to fill her and a smile began tugging at her lips as that feeling of peace washed over her, a feeling she hadn't felt for a while now, not since the attack that had left her unable to sleep for more than 2 hours at a time.

So lost in her musings, Emily didn't notice the approaching figure till they nearly tripped over her outstretched legs. Automatically, as if on instinct she lifted her wand, but paused almost instantly and smiled. She'd notice that flaming red hair anywhere, "Nice trip Lily?" she asked, teasing her friend about the fall she'd almost had. It had been a while since the two girls had talked, Emily figured it hadn't been since before the attacks. "Everything okay?"

[lilyevans]

While things were a bit complicated she knew that it had been worse for Marlene and Emily than it had been for her. Why they hadn't attacked her, she never could figure out. As she wasn't around her friends then, as something had lured her away, and for the life of her she couldn't remember what it was, exactly. She had felt guilty because if she'd been near them, she most likely would have fought to keep them out of harm's way. Which is precisely what she had been thinking of when she had nearly tripped over poor Emily. "Ooh, sorry. Guess I wasn't paying attention. Been kind of lost in thought I suppose. Given everything that's happened since Start of Term."

On top of the attacks, she had been trying to stay close to Severus to keep an eye on him, but that seemed to be almost impossible these days, and she was sure she was losing him. A fact that startled her. Ever since the attacks though, Professor Dumbledore had been making sure the Prefects were keeping up with their jobs, to ensure the safety of everyone around them. As they didn't want anyone else to get hurt. That was something she and Professor Dumbledore shared in common.

"I suppose, everything's alright. What about you? I feel like I've been such a bad friend, not being there for you and Marlene....during this time. Not to mention Lachie too. I should've been there, to help...to make sure all of this didn't happen. It was unnecessary." Potter had not even bothered her during the time that her friends had been gone, and Severus....well he was a complicated wizard even before then, but now she really didn't understand him. It was true though that she'd been closer to Marlene and Emily than she had been with Lachie but still no one deserved what had happened to those girls. Which was one of the reasons she hadn't been able to sleep.

If she did, it didn't last long. She couldn't remember the last time she'd gotten a full night's sleep. She was honestly concerned for her friend, not just about how she was right now, but over all. It was the same way she was with all of her friends, muggle or otherwise.

[Emily Prescott]

All Emily could do was nod her head, she knew all to well about becoming lost in your own thoughts especially with what she herself had been through and was still suffering with now. "I can understand that...believe me.." she said quietly, allowing her arms to rest ontop of her knees as she pulled her legs up and out of the way of anyone tripping over them again, whilst her eyes remained on the Black Lake, seeking some sort of peace from it, a calmness.

Emily looked up at Lily and patted the space beside her, indicating that the red head should sit down, make herself comfortable. It'd be nice to have some company, although she no longer felt strength in numbers held any positive meaning anymore. There had been three of them that night in the forest, and they'd still been taken down extremely easily, taunted, made to suffer...no numbers no longer mattered.

"I'm okay...well I'm trying to be...nightmares are still bad so I'm sleeping...hard to try and forget when all anyone around here can do is sit there whispering about you..." she told Lily with a sigh, and a slight shrug of her shoulders. Looking at Lily she frowned and shook her head, "Lil sweetie, there's nothing you could have done...the attack was planned we were pretty much had as soon as we left the castle and don't dare think you've been a bad friend...and don't be blaming yourself for anything...it was unecessary yeah but there's nothing you coulvd've done and probably would have only got hurt yourself so stop thinking like that okay..."

Emily could understand the guilt Lily felt but really there was no need on it, really she couldn't have done anything. Emily was an expert on defensive spells and even she had succumb to the curses's thrown at her.

[lilyevans]

It wasn't just being lost in her own mind, but the horrible memories, of knowing that she hadn't been there. Dumbledore himself had said there had not been nothing she could have done but it didn't matter, nothing did. She felt responsible for ensuring their safety. They were innocent, and they shouldn't have been put through the pain...as it was something that was unforgiveable. It took a few minutes for her to sit down, and be comfortable with it. Her wand was firmly in her grasp as there was more than enough to worry about without worrying that she was going to be next. "Yes, I could use some company as well." She looked out to the Black Lake, hoping to find some comfort from the waters...but there was none to be had. It wouldn't change the fact that there were more victims than there should have been. Three witches alone, wasn't enough. She had known that the night of the attack....and yet she still believed there was power in numbers, true numbers. If she had known of the attack that night, she'd have done everything to get them out of there, and suffered for it.

When Emily spoke up once again, she felt so guilty, even though she knew there might not have been anything she could have done for her friends but they needed her now, more than before, not to ask them about what had happened that night, but just to be there. To listen should they need to talk about it. Talking was something she wasn't sure Emily would be all that comfortable about with this particular subject.

She sighed, gripping her wand tighter than before. "I'd have given anything to have been there, to have gotten you three out of there that night. Even if it meant that I had to suffer three times....each for it. I still don't understand their logic. Why didn't they target me? I'm a muggleborn....there's no reason they would have left me out of it....if I had been with you guys that night, but I'd be okay with it, if they'd cursed me and left the rest of you alone. There is something I could've done. I know it. I might not have been able to protect all three of you but I would have tried. I should've been there. I'm a Prefect. It's my job to watch out for things like this and I missed it. How did I not see that coming, with everything else that was going on? A good friend would've been with you and the others that night. Not off on another part of the grounds, I don't know what was so important that night, that I was not there. I'd....die for any one of my friends, Em. That's just the kind of girl I am. That's not going to change. I bet Severus would have known what was going on...why he didn't tell me anything I'll never know. It was his house that did it...his friends from there....I will never forgive myself for it...for not trusting my instincts. I knew there was going to be a....an attack that night...I just I wasn't sure where. My instincts had never let me down until that night." That was as honest as she had been, not only with herself but with Emily. She felt responsible, even if Em was right and there hadn't been a bloody thing she could have done to stop it.

[Emily Prescott]

Emily listened to her red headed friend with a small frown, unable to understand why it was Lily felt so guilty about not being there night. She should really be thankful, Emily was, she was glad no one else had had to endure the pain and torment, or live through the after effects like Lachie, Marlene and her still where. It wasn't just the physical injuries that still affected them...Emily still felt the searing pain of the Cruciatus curse occasionally, suffered bad pain if she even so much as breathed too deep thanks to the kicks she'd received to the abdomen...then there was the emotional trauma. Ducking when you saw a shadow, being too scared to sleep because every time you did you were taken back to that night, scared to look at any of the Slytherins due to the fact you didn't know which one of them had done this to you...except of course she knew of Bellatrix, just none of the others.

"Lily we were lured out there under the pretence of serving detention...do you really think the attackers were going to risk trying to get a prefect down there...not only a prefect but you! Lily Evans...that would've ruined their plans instantly...they wouldn't have risked that." she explained, Lily never broke the rules unless it involved hexing Potter, so there was no reason she would've received a detention. Emily had simply assumed she'd been given one because she'd been out past curfew, so in a way had expected and accepted it.

"I know...we're alike like that...I'd easily put my life on the line for any of my friends...nearly did with Marlene that night but Lily please just stop feeling guilty for something you had no way of preventing...it happened...and we're alive...you never got hurt just be thankful..." she said gently, ending it with a small shrug at the end. Biting down on her lip, Emily released a small sigh, running her hand soothingly across her stomach, "Just be careful around Snape...I know your friends but...there's something not right about him Lil...it might be hard to consider but maybe it's time you took a step back from him..." she said, Snape was known to hang around with Bellatrix, and in Emily's mind he wasn't to be trusted for that.

[lilyevans]

She was always protective over those she was friends with, just as fiercely as she had been with her family, even Petunia. She wasn't sure why she felt quite so guilty about not being there that night, except she hated to see her friends in pain. Yes, she was thankful that she hadn't been hurt, but still, she would've done anything to make sure they weren't the ones in pain. Two of them had been muggleborns just like herself, and the other had been a Pureblood, and still none of it had made much sense. Being protective was in her nature, in her blood. It was what she had always done for Severus until lately, as she hadn't seen him too much since before the attacks. Perhaps he was making his own plans with the Slytherins, and if that was the case she would be ready for it. She would not be blindsided like her friends had been. Perhaps she was a fool for wanting to take the fall, to allow herself to be injured in such a way in order to spare her friends the pain. She had her suspicions about who had been there that night from the other side, the night that the curses were thrown at her friends that particular night. But from now on she would be ready, she had to be. She would never allow something like this to happen again under her watch. It was one of the things she had promised herself once she had learned of the first attack.

"I know. I know they lured you three out there under false pretenses, I'm no fool. I'm just a Prefect. I'm no better than any of the others, not when it comes to their insane notion of blood purity, because in that respect, I'm just as bad as someone who isn't a Prefect. How would I have ruined their plans? I'm just one witch, there would have been four of us that night, that's the only difference. My job, as a Prefect...I'm supposed to watch to make sure nothing like this happens. And I failed. I failed because I didn't trust my instincts. I didn't get there fast enough. But it will never happen again, not as long as I am still breathing." She said, her voice shaking and yet it showed just how determined she was. She wasn't about to let anyone else get put through the pain that Marlene and Emily did, as she knew those two better than Lachie. Lachie was a Hufflepuff, and the other two belonged to her house, Gryffindor. Not that where they lived mattered, but still she would not allow something like this from happening ever again.

Or if it did to be there when it occurred so she could pinpoint exactly who had done it and they could be punished properly, even if she was in severe pain because of what they would do to her. "I'm no different than you or Marlene or Lachie. We're all the same age. I feel guilty I suppose because I feel like I didn't do my job right. Because if I had, I'd have been able to do more. When I heard of the attack, I was angry...still am. It's not the fact that they targeted my friends, but because none of you deserved it. I'll try and move past it just like you and the others will have to. We've got to move on, not that we'll forget it, unfortunately. If my instincts are right, and they usually are, I don't think this attack that happened on you, Marlene and Lachie will be the last. I think they are planning for a second strike, but I just I don't know when it'll be and I have no proof so it's not like I can go to Dumbledore or the other Professors and tell them about it. As it's only my suspicions and I have no real proof to give them. I think that's why you and I get along so well as we're both protective, both willing to die for those we care about. I'm grateful that none of you lost your lives that night, if you had I'd have probably....I'd have lost it. And this castle wouldn't have been safe as I would've wanted revenge....and stopped at nothing to make sure they were properly punished." She said as she sighed once, although she was listening to everything that Emily was saying, she couldn't help but be on extra alert and no one could blame her for that. After all she was still a muggleborn just like Emily was. Then the bomb came down, when her friend's name was brought up. She didn't entirely understand why everyone from her house seemed to despise him but she had taken care of herself this far. Severus wouldn't hurt her, he couldn't, could he?

"Yes, Em. We've been friends since before I arrived at Hogwarts. He taught me everything he knew. He's been there for me. He told me all about Hogwarts. I know most of those in our house have no reason to trust him. But...how can I betray the one wizard who told me about this world long before I recieved my letter to attend Hogwarts? I promise Emily, I'll be careful, until I take my...my last breath. It's more than hard to consider when you see those you love and respect being tortured. I know that he is not a favorite of the Gryffindor House....but until I see reason I won't turn my back against him. Slytherins and Gryffindors have had a rivalry that goes back for centuries, to the beginning of Hogwarts' foundation. Nobody can change that. I know that Severus....may not be the best guy for me to hang around with, and that he has 'friends' who are clearly twisted in their own minds, but if you were in my shoes, Em, what would you do? He's the only one I have at home. If you think, I'm not aware of the fact he is close with Bellatrix Black and that lot, you are mistaken. I trust him, I always have. But I'll do what I have to, watch my back so that I won't become a victim of something he and his little friends might have in store for me." And with that she smirked. She could be quite clever when she had to be, and knew Severus better than almost anyone, and with that, she had convinced herself that maybe he wouldn't hurt her like everyone else seemed to be waiting for him to do so.